The Crypt of Baylor

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santrix
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Joined: Mon Mar 15, 2021 12:30 pm

The Crypt of Baylor

Post by santrix »

Ok so, never ran a game..yet, but here's my first dabble at adventure writing..

Coming from 5e so I've just ruled things on the fly, feedback appreciated.
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Last edited by santrix on Wed Mar 17, 2021 11:53 am, edited 1 time in total.
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chiisu81
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Re: 1st adventure attempt - The Crypt of Baylor - For perusal

Post by chiisu81 »

Always great to see more adventures posted 8-) Have done just a quick read-through so far, but this could certainly be in consideration for the eventual AA4.

I see on the title page you need some of our fonts. I'll try to remember to PM you a Dropbox link when I'm back on my work system.
Note that in the monster entries if there's just one opponent you won't use "ea." after the XP value.
I see that a few of your text boxes are rather large. It's great to have details, but most of those should be for the GM. The players should be given just enough when entering an area/room, but it will be up to what they do to determine what and when to tell them more.
Could you possibly share the ODT file along with the PDF?
santrix
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Joined: Mon Mar 15, 2021 12:30 pm

Re: 1st adventure attempt - The Crypt of Baylor

Post by santrix »

Done, yeah I wondered about that re the xp. I worked form the template provided, so not sure where the font is missing except for maybe the title.

My main concern and worry was how i was presenting on the fly mechanics that would be covered by this and that skill check in other systems which I'm more used to using.

Large text boxes, yeah i see your point. I suppose I always find it pleasing as a GM to have a clear cut description of what the players see, even when running pre published I always paraphrase anyway, but if the BFRPG likes small boxes, I can adjust and re-write. I'm already working on a better looing map, that was my first go at scrawl.

On the subject of maps, I use a plethora of other apps such as Profantasy, Dungeondraft Arkenforge etc for my roll20 games but I get the flavour of BFRPG and the plain old school look. I'm thinking even printer friendly versions of maps made using more 'pretty' apps would look out of place.
Seven
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Re: 1st adventure attempt - The Crypt of Baylor

Post by Seven »

An order is a religious organization.
By extension, religious knights were also arranged by orders.

The Gang of the Bell would make a lot more sense.

Page 4. "a days walk" maybe rather "a day's walk"?

"After defeating or dealing with the wolves the PCs should 1-2 on 1d6 chance to find the true tracks of the bandits heading back to the hideout" maybe "have a 1-2 on a d6 chance to find the tracks". I didn't get the impression that there are "fake" tracks to find.

The 1-3 odds for a thief could be mentioned in the same sentence.

Do we need the unarmored move for the goblins? Is that normally given?
What was the Morale value "if alone" mean?
Seven
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Re: 1st adventure attempt - The Crypt of Baylor

Post by Seven »

Page 5. "Doors within the crypt are closed with iron latches, but rotting, making it easy to bash down or through."

I think the key with the latches is not if they are iron or some other metal, but which side of the doors they are on. I guess they are no random encounters and the PCs can bash the doors inconsequentially?

1. "After several minutes spent removing the camouflaging foliage at the entrance to the cave", it's probably best not to assume what the PCs will do like that.

3. This room is 20'x25' but the description say it's a 15'x30' hallway.

4. "The sarcophagus contains remains of a male in chainmail armor" missing "the".

"There is jewelry inside worth 100gp." I would expect the jewels to be described, even if not in details. I'd never give a value to the players.

"the bones showing evidence of teeth marks. On a roll of 1 on 1d6 the teeth marks can be identified as being human." Human teeth marks on bones? This isn't a bite on an apple. Maybe leave a human tooth among the lot instead?
santrix
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Re: 1st adventure attempt - The Crypt of Baylor

Post by santrix »

Thanks, that's super thorough... :)
Seven
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Re: 1st adventure attempt - The Crypt of Baylor

Post by Seven »

We're welcome.

Page 5.

4. Still

"This is a goodly act and the DM can reward the PCs with a suitable XP reward."

You should go all the way and provide the XP value. Nobody will feel bound by it anyway.

5. "It rises about 4’ off of the stone floor, unlike the sarcophagus to the south, which sits 2’ lower."

I find this confusing. Are you comparing to another sarcophagus in another room? If so, avoid doing that, maybe the party came here first or didn't pay attention to the other area.

"The northern wall of this chamber has four alcoves with stone shelves set into them that appear empty."

Personally, I try to reserve the word "appear" for DM only text detailing things that are not as they appear. When providing a description just say it's empty, unless it's being narrated by someone.

"This two tiered sarcophagus originally housed both Teela Baylor and Lord Trystan Baylor, the former interred in a compartment underneath her husband separated by a plain stone slab engraved with flowers."

Ah. This is much clearer. I didn't get this at all from the box text.
Again, describe the jewelry in detail. A party will always be on the look out for something that looks magical or valuable. Necklaces, bracelets, etc, material, emblems, etc.

About the shadow:
Ml 12, XP 100 ea.

Should be 100 XP, not 100 XP each.
Not sure about the Morale here. Will the shadow flee somewhere if brought down to half-hp or fail the morale check? If so, maybe provide hints as to what it might do next if the sarcophagus is destroyed, like where will it flee, when will it return, etc.
Seven
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Re: 1st adventure attempt - The Crypt of Baylor

Post by Seven »

Page 7.

6. "As a result they still have their weapons and 2d6gp each."

I don't know if there are GMs who like to roll dice like that, but I much prefer to have the result already computed, unless we're talking about wandering monsters. So, maybe just declare that one has a short sword and 8 gp and the other a longsword and 3 gp, or something like that.

"a Bracer of Strength engraved with scenes of battle giving the wearer a +1 to hit with
their unarmed attack rolls."

That doesn't sound like a Bracer of Strength, more like a Bracer of Brawling.

"XP 300 ea."

Again, you don't need the "ea.".
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chiisu81
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Re: 1st adventure attempt - The Crypt of Baylor

Post by chiisu81 »

Here's r2
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Seven
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Re: [AA4] The Crypt of Baylor

Post by Seven »

Page 7

7. "This 25' x 40' chamber"

On the map, it looks more like 25' x 25'.

Page 8.

"If either sarcophagi is touched"

Singular is sarcophagus.

"causing everyone within ten feet to test save vs wands or take 1d4 HP of damage."

I believe usage is to "save vs something" not to "test save vs something"

"A roll of 1 on 1d6 (1-4 for wizard classes) identify that the rods can be connected, without doing so both spell books refuse to be opened."

That should be something the players have to figure out on their own. No rolling dice instead of thinking.

"Maintaining the rods in a connected state creates a Rod of The Arcane, which allows a maximum of one level 1 spell to be stored within it daily."

That comes out like one needs to hold both ends together which would be very awkward.
The Rod of the Arcane should be described in details in appendix at the end.
If it's lifted from somewhere copyright and source might have to be disclosed.

"a recently removed human heart"

I don't think removed is the right word unless you specify exactly removed from where.
It's basically a live, still beating human heart.

"If the altar is searched a roll of 1 on 1d6 (1-2 for thief classes) reveals a secret compartment at the side."

Should just mention the secret compartment as it seems normal rules apply for finding it.

"If checked for traps a successful success on the same test reveals a classic spike trap."

I'm not sure what a classic spike trap is. Spikes are usually found at the bottom of pits.

"a Scroll of Healing inscribed upon a copper leaf"

Copper could be a color but I guess it's a leaf made of copper. How big is it?

"and a Healing Salve that restores 1HP as a single use."

I don't get the single use. It would be weird if one required 3 doses to restore a single hit point.
Maybe a bottle containing just enough Healing Salve to restore a single hit point?
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